Element Chronicles: Part 5

When we last left our intrepid buying duo, their hopes were dashed. The orange Element was not only orange due to paint color, but to rust as well. And they had been given the cold shoulder by another dealer. Would they find the vehicle of their dreams at a price slightly lower than a Maserati lease at $1999 per month?

We arrived at Continental Honda in Countryside. I dropped Jeani off while I looked for parking; the place was packed so I ended up just parking in a kind-of-not spot. On the way in both of us spotted the Element.

Once we entered the showroom we met Stephanie, our only guide on this journey. Stephanie took us out to the car and let us play around with it and inspect it. The body was clean. Very clean. The interior was also very clean. There was a little wear here and there, but nothing abnormal. There is a slight separation on the driver's seat - much like the full-blown rip on the orange Element - but Jeani said she'd be willing to sew it. "I could sew it right now." At first, I thought she meant right then, which struck me as odd given we didn't own the car.

While playing around with the controls, I found the controls for the wipers, both front and rear. I squirted some washer fluid on the windshield and everything was fine. I then pulled the handle back. I looked in the rear view mirror and laughed out loud.

"What?" Jeani asked.

I pulled the handle back again and laughed again.

"What? What?" she said.

"Look in the back. The nozzle squirts out!"

And it did. The nozzle that was supposed to squirt on the rear window of our car would, in fact, squirt the windshield of the car behind us! I thought it was the funniest thing ever.

"We could squirt it at kids!" I said, referring to the non-existant kids on our street. We laughed a lot at this idea. "Or we could drain the system and put some lemonade in it!" Truly, this was a fun problem.

Stephanie copied our driver's licenses and came back for the test drive. I took a route I was familiar with in Countryside, heading up La Grange Road to 47th. "Have you ever test driven with us before?" Stephanie asked. "No," I said, to which she replied, "You're following the exact same route we normally take people on!"

The car felt good. It felt very good. The brakes - a problem in one we saw last weekend (sponge cake-like) - were good. It handled well. The engine sounded good.

We returned to the dealership and took another few moments to look the car over. It was then that I spotted the only real minus: the front tires differed from the rear. But everything else was fine, so we decided to sit down and talk about it.

I might add at this point that Stephanie was totally cool and non-pressure. She was available (except for one time a little later on), and didn't ram a thing down our throats.

We did the sit down and talked price. We had our ceiling, and after a few rounds back and forth - including the obligatory one with the manager (who wasn't a jerk, honestly!) and a "final" one wherein I thought we wouldn't get the car - they came down to our comfort zone. That was the good thing. We told them to throw in some floor mats, and we'd call it a deal. They said yes.

So we said yes!

The next hour or so was rather standard. Lots of signatures, lots of paperwork, lots of talk with the finance guy. Ultimately we decided to get an extended war... er, service contract that would cover our heinies for up to 100,000 miles, or March 2010, whichever comes first (2010).

When all the paperwork was finished we got to take all of our stuff out of the Beetle and transfer it to the Element. Then, Stephanie gave us the lowdown on the controls - something I haven't had happen since the PT as it's usually just "seeya" - and we did a final look at the car, which had been thoroughly washed and cleaned. It was only then that I remembered the lemonade dispenser on the back of the car.

No problem, though - we needed to come back for the floor mats, so they'd take care of it then.

With that, we drove off in our new, 2003 Honda Element EX 4WD OMG LOLFR. We got some dinner - after spending the entire afternoon at two dealerships, filled up the tank, and took the long drive back home. We got to take Lake Shore Drive up to Evanston. It was a beautiful, crisp, chilly night.

With that, our tumultuous car buying and owning experiences came to a close. The Honda really and truly is in it for the long haul - as are we.